Dirty Wash
by mgcrtr
Summary: Korra reflects on losing bending and watches as Tahno changes.


**Disclaimer: Not mine :(**

_Summery: Korra reflects on losing bending and watches as Tahno changes._

...

_Dirty Wash_

...

Korra thought it only horrible, terrible to lose… God, it's hard for her to even think about it. About losing ben—the power over an element. She told Tahno (later, far later in her life) that she's sorry, so sorry that she couldn't stop what happened even though he was a total jerk and cheater. No one deserved to have that torn from them. No one deserved to have, like, half of their soul stolen. But she figured they would still go on living, because, well because what else is there to do but live? And it would suck and be embarrassing to not bend anymore, but she'd always imagined (once she imagined past the shock of simply not being able to bend which was hard to do) the new post-benders would keep on living, and just, do normal non-bending, and - Shit. She didn't know. She just didn't imagine death.

"It's all I think about," Tahno told her. "Just haven't found a flashy enough non-bender way to do it yet."

But that was later, when he was okay with swapping his thoughts with hers and worked a non-bender job without too much heartache.

At the Water Tribe Nooderly before they were on speaking terms but after Tahno became a non-bender, he ate soup alone, blowing on it before slowly spooning it slowly into his mouth. He sat in the center of the room so that no polar bear dogs could stuff their heads through the windows. There was no second chair across from him.

But that didn't matter. Korra pulled a chair from the unoccupied table next to him and dropped down across from him. Her elbows pounded down on the table, and Tahno didn't look up. She frowned, there wasn't anyone with him. No friends from past life. She asked where they all were. He said they were all afraid to catch his symptoms. "Maybe you run from me too," he said. "Follow your so _accepting _people."

Korra tried to sniff regally, like she'd seen Asami do. "I am the Avatar."

He took another slow sip of soup. "All the more reason to run."

Korra scowled. "I'm not afraid."

Tahno looked up from his bowl, grinning, white teeth all a little pointed. "Of course you're not. You're only the Avatar, peacekeeper of the world and master of all four, sorry," Tahno dropped his gaze back to his bowl, like he was trying to be modest with her, and took another spoonful of soup, "three elements."

Korra's lip curled in disgust. "Fine." She stood, hands pressed into the table. "I'll run and leave you to your friendlessnessself. Not like I was trying to be nice or anything, you – arg." Korra hit her leg on a table. Tahno snickered. Korra's arms spun; she exploded the soup in his face.

Tahno stopped laughing.

Korra dropped her arms. "I didn't…"

Tahno clumsily wiped the liquid off with a napkin. The cloth folded in awkward places and not everything quite came off his face. She stood there, staring. Like, like he was Pabu putting on a show.

It had been what, three days? Maybe? Since… Since Amon had… Korra never used a napkin to dry off. Did she even know how to properly use a napkin? That was a stupid question. Why was Korra asking herself stupid questions? "You should probably get going," Tahno finally told her.

"I didn't think. I just –"

"Of course you didn't think," Tahno stood, throwing money on the table, "You're a child. Too fucking powerful with no fucking strategy. They want you to bring peace to the people? You can't even protect us."

"Yeah, well I don't cheat!"

"What does that have to do with anything?"

"You're a good for nothing cheat!"

"I don't think that's what you should be worrying about right now. Besides," Tahno laughed humorlessly, "I really ended up saving your ungrateful Avatar ass. I think you owe me one now."

They slammed shoulders as he shoved past her, leaving Narook's Seafood Noodlery.

...

They met on the edge of Republic City, high over the bay, sea breeze soft and the railing that was supposed to keep little kids from falling to their doom, Korra's chilling spot. However, perhaps "met" is not quite the word for their next confrontation, but Korra liked it a lot more than what happened. She was just looking out, thinking about things.

When… "Death to bending!" She spun and his hand slammed to her forehead, his other to her throat. "I hereby take your powers!" She burned Tahno's eyebrows off. A reflexive move. He jerked back, hysterical, doubled over, crying. She clenched her hands. He roared with laughter.

"Oh God, your face. Your face! It was priceless you were scared like a little shit and oh God!"

She turned red and cursed him out, and spun back to the ocean instead of the smug non-bender's face. "You fucking whore, you - you bitch, you little shit head and, and –"

Tahno wiped the tears from his eyes. "Okay, relax. Someone needed to keep you on your toes."

Korra sputtered and crossed her arms. Her hips stuck out front and her back rounded. Tahno raised his non-existant eyebrows and his tongue slid over his top lip, not that she saw him do any of that.

"What are you even doing here?" Korra asked stiffly, when Tahno vocalized nothing more than a wayward chuckle or two. "Don't you have something better to do, some fangirls to be fanned over by?"

Tahno dropped his arms over the railing next to her. "Not anymore, sweet cheeks."

Silence. An awkward silence for Korra that she itched to fill, but couldn't find words to fix. She fidgeted and the peace she had been trying to achieve but failing at for about an hour was totally blown now.

"There should be a name for me."

"What?"

"Something… sizzling, avant-grade. Hmmm… Maybe…" Tahno eyes narrowed. "The _Two-Timers._"

"What in spirits' names are you talking –"

"No, how about: _Defeated Chi's_. Or maybe, the _Dirty Wash. _Get it? Like washed up benders who can't actually bend anymore. The dirty wash everyone knows needs to be taken care of but no one wants to admit to or see or deal with."

"Tahno…"

"You are in so much spirit's shit. I don't think spirits shit, but you're still somehow in their waste. - As a romantic, I can tell you every time Avatar Aang went into the Avatar state and what prompted him to, and the massive destruction that he managed. I can also say how many times you've been in it too."

"Oh yeah? Impress me."

"None."

Korra glared, and Tahno soldiered on.

"And if you haven't gone into the Avatar State when a douche was taking another douche's bending out from under your very nose and a whole _stadium _was being destroyed, you're not going to be able to glow when Amon is about to take your life or your boy or your polar bear or the last airbenders."

"You're a dick."

"Someone needs to be a dick to the Avatar. Who better than someone who's got nothing to lose?"

"Whatever, Dirty Wash."

Tahno grinned, and Korra scowled. "It does have a nice ring to it, doesn't it?"

Korra was the one who walked away, leaving Tahno at the cliff, feeling the sea breeze on his skin. It had to be just him - because Korra didn't know how to airbend yet, right? – but the breeze seemed a little more… violent than normal.

...

Korra tried to find peace with a midnight walk through the Air Temple when she rounded a corner, and Tahno was there. Right there. Sleeping out in the open. Korra blinked, looked away to the still island and the still glowing Republic City. She looked back. Still there. Maybe he'd snuck in. But no. If he snuck in, he wouldn't have an Air Temple blanket.

Korra kicked him off of his mattress and he shot up.

"What are you doing here?" she hissed to him.

"Hello to you too, Avatar Wash." Tahno rolled over and tugged the blanket back over him. "Now, goodnight."

"What are you doing at the Air Temple? You're supposed to be bumming it on the streets!"

Tahno sighed, rubbed his eyes and sat up. The blanket fell down from his neck and his naked torso gleamed in the moon light.

"Well, maybe not _supposed_ to be bumming on the streets, but I - I thought that was what you were -"

Tahno waved her words away "Please, like anyone could pay enough for this body."

Korra snorted and crossed her arms. "I wouldn't pay a cent."

"That's because you don't like your boys long and lanky. You want thick muscle." Tahno sniffed. "Your taste is old fashioned."

"I like boys who can match me in a fight."

"I managed that pretty finely, if I do recall."

"Cheating!"

"Honestly, Korra, Avatars are made to stop the cheaters and the meat heads and the criminals." Tahno flopped back onto his mattress, tugged the blanket over his body. "The Avatar has to beat everyone not playing by the rules by playing by all the rules. If people were playing by the rules, then we wouldn't need the Avatar, who is the epitome of cheating, anyway, as having four elements when everyone else just gets one, or none, to cream everyone else into pie filling. You, Avatar Wash, do not get to complain about cheating. Now, for some beauty sleep." Tahno yawned. "I should get paid for caring enough to keep the world a beautiful place."

Korra flipped a coin at Tahno's head, walking back to her room, because meditation was officially a lost cause with Tahno in the _Air Temple_.

...

Tahno explained to her in the morning after insulting her for a good solid minute, then insulting Mako, and then playing with Tenzin's kids for about an hour that he was here because Tenzin wanted to keep watch to see if there were lasting effects of being the Dirty Wash. "Besides, you know, all the emotional turmoil and sudden bursts of insanity, depression; all that fun stuff. And something about water benders chill at this temple and want a crack at healing me. Tenzie thinks my chi's just blocked for an extended period or some spirit crack. Like honestly, you'd think that-"

Jinora tugged on Tahno's clothing. "What's it like?"

Tahno stopped, looking from Korra to Jinora. "What is what like?"

"Not being able to bend anymore."

Tahno shrugged and walked out of the room. His arms slid up around himself once Jinora was out of view. He headed to the edge of the island, where the rock was jagged, sharp spears of death, pain, prolonged torture, punishment. In the cracks, where the wind didn't hit so hard and where sunlight could still shine, there were a few purple buds. Tahno dropped his arms, squinted into the full sliding sun; Korra was bad at being stealthy. He asked her if she thought about flying.

"Sometimes."

"I'll never be able to fly."

"There are balloons and gliders."

"I want to fly the way Avatar Aang could. Without any of these new age stuff. Just, zoom."

Korra slipped her arms around herself and agreed.

Tahno told her it was terrible, and Korra asked what _it_ was.

"Losing bending. I had it for so long. It was my _way _of life. Then to have that gone. It's like I've lost half myself. I'm just some pretty packaging now, there's no waterbending surprise inside. I can't do shit anymore. I hate being here, too. It's harder being here than in the city. I can see all the water here, clean water that I should be able to _feel, _pure and alive, and it just isn't breathing anymore." Tahno shifted his stance, moved his arms, and water didn't rise. He slammed his arms to his side. "Dead!" he screamed, "Dead, dead-deaddead, it's all just _fucking __**dead!**_"

Tahno threw a clump of dirt into the ocean and water barely even splashed up.

...

Jinora and Tahno became great friends. Tahno loved to talk and Jinora loved to listen.

It didn't really make sense to Korra, because Jinora could get _annoying_, until she caught Jinora shooting Tahno into the air with jets of wind.

He really just wanted to fly.

Korra and Tahno talked (insulted each other) for two days before Tahno couldn't take it anymore, and he left the temple.

..

Tahno got a job at Narook's Seaweed Noodlery, where he knew the menu from the back of his hand. He waited on tables, took shit from the Clean Wash (as he liked to call benders who could still bend) and learned how to do dishes without waterbending.

Korra liked to come in and eat there, sometimes with Mako and Bolin or Jinora who wanted another story from Tahno, but she liked it better when she headed in alone and she got her food and they insulted each other a little. Tahno never held back. Calling her coward when it was appropriate and telling her to get her balls in order when she needed it.

Korra looped in after the noodlery was closed one night, the light still on in the back. She paused at the entranceway of the backdoor (she'd grown accustomed to letting herself in), watching Tahno rinse off the dishes. She slipped some water through his hands, and he froze. He shifted his stance, and Korra mirrored it. When he moved his arm, she bent water against the dishes for him, moved it, cleaned the soap away. Tahno dropped his arms, Korra forgot to drop hers, and the water still stood.

"You're a dick," Tahno told her, not even looking back at the flustered Avatar.

"Hey, I was being nice."

"Right." Tahno adjusted his apron, moved back to the dishes and continued to hand rinse. "Make the Dirty Wash think he was finally getting bending back, and then take it all from him again."

"Let me," Korra said. She shoved Tahno out of the way before he could argue and did the dishes. She broke three in the process, but hey, it only took a couple of minutes. Then only a few seconds and a fire shot to char the broken pieces into oblivion.

"Are you going to pay for those?"

Korra shook her head. "I'm a broke Avatar Wash."

Tahno huffed. "Should've just let me do it."

"And taken years? Nope."

Tahno got about four good, lashing insults out, before Naga interrupted and broke four more dishes. Korra didn't apologize as she hopped on the blob of fur and ran off in the direction of sirens.

...

They found a way into the same jail cell. Korra was there first, and because Naga was out of all other options, she'd gotten Tahno to mastermind the escape.

It hadn't worked. At least Naga had tried.

They ended up in the same room, and Tahno said he wouldn't mind dying this way. "Make me feel like I was still doing something."

"I thought you wanted something flashy for death."

"Yeah well, I'll take what I can get. Why aren't you just cutting a hole in the door?"

"Hello, not an airbender here."

"Hello, waterbender there."

"With what water? Your blood?"

"Sometimes I think you have a brain, and then I remember you lived by choice on a land made of ice. Work on sweating, Avatar Wash."

"You sweat," Korra sneered back.

"I don't sweat."

"You do now. Jog. Or die without flamboyancy."

Tahno jogged.

It took about twenty minutes before Korra bent a ball of sweat big enough to carve a hole for them to emerge from and sneak (sprint like mo-fos with Koh the face eater after them) to safety. Once they were out of immediate danger, Tahno found them a safe house and Korra some non-Korra looking clothes.

"Welcome to the Dirty Wash Lines," Tahno announced.

"To die another day." Korra grinned and shook hands with someone else who Tahno had dubbed Dirty Wash.

...

It was five days before Tahno flew without Jinora that Korra almost gave him his bending back, sitting in the air temple, the window behind Korra looking to the ocean. Tahno licked his lips as Korra prepared whatever it was she had to prepare. Soon he'd be able to feel the life there again.

Korra could taste victory on her lips as she bent a ball of water and energy between her hands. Tahno reached along the sides of it. He plunged his hands into the swirling mixture. Felt water's breath again, its movement and heart beat and strength. He felt it and his throat caught and he heaved in the energy.

Too quickly. Too soon. Too eager.

No control.

The mixture exploded out of their grips.

Tahno slammed against the wall. Korra hurtled out of the window and into the ocean. He heard the roar of a water spout, and he knew she was okay. But he… He hurt.

His fingers… He looked down at the burnt colored skin. He couldn't feel anything pain there. He reached down to touch the cool ground and he couldn't feel it with his skin. He hid his hands in long sleeves when Korra came back.

"Tough luck," he said.

"Tahno, I'm… I'm sorry."

"Didn't think it was going to work anyway." Korra looked away. "Besides, I bet the sudden vigor of bending again would kill me. Like when a seventy year old virgin has sex with a hot babe from the Pearl District. Bam. Death; shocked by too much sudden vigor." Korra reached for Tahno and he slid away under the pretense of picking up a piece of rubble. "Just make sure you do eventually get all that dirty wash clean. We're starting to smell."

...

Korra played pretend with Tahno three days before he committed suicide.

He asked her this time, and as he went through the bending stances, hands covered in gloves, Korra popped the water to where it was supposed to go if he was still a bender.

...

The day before he drowned in the ocean (or was he killed upon impact?), Korra watched Jinora fly Tahno through the sky above Republic City.

They came home laughing, and Korra heard a suspicious report of yellow rain falling on some pompous citizens of Republic City.

...

Tahno died late at night.

In the morning he called Mako a number of things, including a slut and how he needed to get his girl problems figured out. He told Bolin that if they went one on one without fighting, he could still kick Bolin's ass. He gave Asami his favorite shampoo, because he said he couldn't stand looking at that shit rag on her head anymore.

"Flashy is too overdone," Tahno told Korra in the center of the day. "Everyone does flashy nowadays. The ones worth remembering are the quiet moments." Korra asked what the fuck he was talking about. "Everyone knows of the moment when Fire Lord Zuko bowed to Avatar Aang and begged for chains. Everyone talks about that more than they talk about Fire Lord Zuko's pop's attempt at becoming Fire Birdy Overlord with all the flames and horns and flags and more flames and shit."

...

Korra heard the bay water scream as Tahno hit it. She heard it sob as his body floated face down.

...

_fin._


End file.
